Unwanted sexting can be very uncomfortable, especially if the person is your friend who got the wrong idea or even your partner. In this case, it is especially difficult to figure out how to respond to unwanted sexting when you wish to preserve the relationship you have with that person.
This post will highlight different scenarios in which unwanted sexting may take place; we showcase 15 different ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting.
5 Ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from someone at work/school
Chances are that you swapped phone numbers or emails with co-workers or classmates, or you possibly followed them via a social media application.
There’s nothing wrong with this because you see each other most days out of the week, but it becomes a problem if he/she decides to send unwanted sexts to your phone.
Here are five ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from a co-worker or classmate:
01Threaten to tell HR/teacher
These types of situations happen more often than you may think, so there is a way to deal with them by going to the administration.
At work, any instances of sexual misconduct, including sexting, needs to be reported to the human resources’ person to handle the matter according to the rules and penalize the person.
In schools, the teachers, guidance counsellors, or principals are usually responsible for addressing and dealing with cases of sexual misconduct.
E.g. “This is very inappropriate and makes me uncomfortable. If you continue to send unsolicited sexual images, I will have to report the matter to HR.”
You have the option of not making it a threat and going forward without a warning. He/she likely values the job or place, and he/she would hate to have to face disciplinary action.
Photo by Brooke Cagle on unsplash
02Say that you’ll tell his/her parents
If you are on holiday, and the school can’t do anything about it, you can threaten to tell his/her parents. This is likely to work because he/she won’t want to get in trouble with his/her parents, especially if the person is not a child. In any case, no one wants to face those consequences.
E.g. “How would you feel if I showed your mom/dad these pictures?”
He/she will get out of whatever sexual mood immediately. No one wants his/her mom and dad to see pictures of genitals or other related images. Therefore, he/she is likely to back off, especially if you’ve met the parents before.
03Confront him/her
Other times, you may want to deal with these situations head-on to get your point across clearly; you can do this by looking him/her in the eye and telling him/her to quit being perverted.
E.g. “Why do you keep sending me those types of text messages? You know that I am in a relationship, and I don’t think of you like that. Please, leave me alone!”
Confronting him/her doesn’t necessarily mean that you should do it in front of other people, but if your aim is to embarrass him/her, then, by all means, you can go ahead.
The efficacy of this will depend on your tone; you will need to have a stern and serious tone to let him/her know that you are not playing around. This is likely going to get him/her to quit contacting you.
Photo by Jopwell under pexels license
04Tell them they have the wrong idea
Sometimes, these situations are misunderstandings that are based on how you interact. If you make little jokes or flirt a little, someone might get the wrong idea and think that you are seriously interested in him/her.
It is important to set him/her straight so that the two of you are on the same page.
E.g. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Is that what you thought this was? I’m not into you like that.”
This response is good because it lets the person know that he/she had the wrong idea; it shows that your intention was never to lead him/her on, especially in a romantic or sexual way.
If you get an unwanted sext, you can use your parents or kids as an excuse so that the person doesn’t feel too bad or embarrassed.
You can use the mom/dad excuse when you’re still in school, and you can use the kids as an excuse when you’re an adult.
E.g. “What is going on? My mom/kids use this laptop. What if he/she saw that picture?! You need to stop sending me those kinds of things immediately!”
Even if he/she is harassing you, any decent person would not want children or someone’s mother to see sexts. This will likely deter the person from doing it again in the future.
Photo by Julia M Cameron under pexels license
5 Ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from a stranger
There are a lot of weirdos out there, especially on social media, and they will try to engage you in unwanted sexting. You need to let them know that you are not interested!
Here are five ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from a stranger:
06Say you have a gf/bf
Even if you don’t have a gf/bf, saying you do is usually a good way to detract others who want to pursue you and have their eyes on you.
E.g. “Sorry, I have a bf/gf, and he/she doesn’t want guys/girls sending me stuff like this!”
This is a pretty polite way of going about it, and depending on the type of stranger that he/she is, it will likely be respected.
Photo by Catarina Bernardo on reshot
07Block them
If you don’t wish to communicate with this person in any way, shape, or form, now, or in the future, you can simply block him/her via your telephone or social media networks. It’s not like you work with the person or have to interact with him/her in reality, so it shouldn’t matter.
You can block him/her without saying anything if you want; if you feel it necessary, you can send a message beforehand:
E.g. “I don’t know why you would send me that picture, and I don’t even know you. I’m going to block you so that you can’t send me anything ever again.”
08Report their profile or number
If you’re on a social media network, there’s always the option of reporting the profile or ID number so that he/she won’t be able to send anything else to you. He/she may even lose the account if policies have been violated through his/her actions.
E.g. “No thank you, I’ll be reporting your profile if you continue to send me stuff like this.”
It lets him/her know that he/she needs to back off before you take it one step further.
Image from freestocks.org under pexels license
09Don’t respond
Not responding to a sext is actually a good “response.” Your silence lets him/her know that you are certainly not interested, and if he/she continues, you’ll continue to ignore the messages too.
He/she will feel a bit embarrassed about being ignored, and he/she is likely going to leave you alone. Engaging this type of person in any way may encourage him/her to continue, so it’s better to ignore him/her.
10Police
Strangers online or in your area may be a bit aggressive when sexting; unfortunately, they may even threaten you, especially if you refuse or reject their messages.
Sometimes, you may even block a person, and he/she will continue to find a way to contact you.
You can respond to this by threatening to contact the police.
E.g. “You’re making me very uncomfortable. If you don’t stop messaging me, I will call the police on you right NOW!”
If you are a minor, and the person who sexted you is an adult, this should be a first resort and a mus. This should not simply be a threat.
5 ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from a partner
It’s not unusual for a partner to want to engage in intimate conversations, but if you don’t want to, you do not have to participate.
There are different ways that you can handle this type of situation; sometimes, you can be direct and other times, indirect. No matter which one you use, they can all work well.
Here are five ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting from a partner:
11Say you’re not in the mood
While you may have sexted your partner in the past, it doesn’t mean that you’ll always be in the mood for it; that’s completely fine.
If you express this to your partner, he/she may be a bit disappointed; however, he/she will likely understand and back off.
E.g. “Those look great babe. Sorry, I’m not feeling up to it right now.”
This is a good way on how to respond to unwanted sexting because it is done in a considerate way. You have acknowledged that you like the pictures, but you are not feeling in the mood to continue or respond.
There’s nothing wrong with him/her, which you have emphasized. This way, he/she won’t feel bad about the rejection.
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio under pexels license
12Explain you’re not ready for that
If you have never sexted and your partner tries to engage you in sexting, especially before you are ready, you should take a minute to stop the person and explain your stance on the topic.
E.g. “Hey, I know that we’ve been together a while. I love you to death, but this is not something that I’m ready for at the moment. Maybe, I’ll be ready for it in a few months, but I’m just not comfortable with it right now.”
This is a good way to explain it to your partner because you do it without making him/her feel bad about starting something with which you aren’t comfortable. It opens the door for honesty and better communication in your relationship.
Photo by Therese Petersson on reshot
13Change the topic
If you feel awkward talking to him/her about it, you can just change the topic. It may be a little abrupt, but if the topic is interesting enough, he/she will forget about it and move on.
E.g. “Did you hear that the new Avenger’s movie just dropped? I’m getting us tickets right now.”
You can do this with any topic that you feel your partner will be excited about.
14Say you fell asleep
This is a classic excuse for when you don’t want to respond to something that you receive via text or social media application. You can simply ignore the messages for a few hours, and you can respond by saying that you fell asleep.
By the time you respond, the person may have even forgotten about the conversation; he/she may no longer be in the mood for that type of talk anymore.
E.g. “Sorry babe, I passed out. I was super tired last night.”
Photo by Marcus Aurelius under pexels license
15Say that you want face-to-face time
If you don’t like sexting, but you aren’t against sexual activities with your partner, you can use this to your advantage. You can say something flirty like:
E.g. “I think that I can show you better than I can tell you.”
This will entice your partner to be with you more than any text, picture, or video ever could do. It will set the mood for the next time that you see each other.
Lastly
There’s nothing wrong with sexting; however, when a person does not consent or simply isn’t into it, it can quickly become sexual harassment.
You can use any of these ways on how to respond to unwanted sexting to let the person know that you are not interested.
