Congratulations on your pregnancy! By now, you must be wondering how to tell kids you are pregnant.
Telling your kids that you are pregnant can be quite tricky, especially if they are too young to understand what it means to be pregnant.
However, you don’t need to worry about how to tell your kids that you are pregnant because we have compiled a quick guide that outlines six different ways on how to tell your kids that you are pregnant.
Let’s take a look at some of the key things that you must bear in mind before telling your kids that you are pregnant:
How to Tell Kids You Are Pregnant: Key Things to Bear in Mind
A new addition to any family is something that should be discussed with all members of the family, regardless of their age. Whether it’s in-depth or as a heads up, here are some things to bear in mind:
Your kids deserve to be informed in some way or another that they can expect a new sibling.
This will help mentally prepare any child or any age to welcome his/her new baby brother/sister. Here are the key things that you should bear in mind before telling them that you are pregnant:
The first thing you should consider is your kid’s age. This will help you to determine the best way to tell them about your pregnancy.
If your kids are very young, it will take a bit of patience and good word selection to ensure that they understand what you mean.
While pre-teens may already understand pregnancy, you may still need to be cautious because they tend to get jealous; this can be caused by their hormones and/or immaturity.
Teenagers and adults are perhaps the easiest people to tell because they already understand what pregnancy means, and they are less likely to get caught off guard when they receive the news.
Photo by Gökhan Bayhan on reshot
If you have a nuclear family, meaning you are in a relationship with the child’s father, it is much easier for kids to accept a pregnancy because it is a natural consequence of a serious relationship.
However, if your partner isn’t your kid’s father, he/she may have a harder time accepting the partner as a member of the family; this is especially true if there was already tension surrounding your relationship with your new partner.
03Your relationship with your kids
If you have a strong relationship with your kid, then it shouldn’t be hard to talk to him/her about being pregnant.
However, if tension exists, the kid may respond negatively or lash out; this should be strongly considered before making a decision on how to tell kids you are pregnant.
Photo by Dasha Pats on reshot
04Time and place
Time and place are important factors when you are about to give someone important news, and it is a super important part of how to tell kids you are pregnant.
The wrong time to tell your kids is when there is a disagreement or when they already feel bad about something; this can cause your kids to react negatively.
The wrong place is usually in front of other people, for example at school, at church, or anywhere public.
05The possibility of a negative reaction
Even if you choose the best way on how to tell kids you are pregnant, there is still the possibility that they have a negative reaction. You must keep your composure while your kids try to understand the idea of being pregnant.
Often, a negative reaction comes from a lack of understanding. You can give your kids some space to process it, and you can take some time to re-evaluate your approach.
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2 Ways to Tell Toddlers and Pre-schoolers That You Are Pregnant
It may take a bit of time for toddlers to really understand what you mean by being pregnant.
It’s always a better idea to wait until you pass the first trimester successfully, and you are in the “green zone” to avoid causing confusion.
Here are two ways on how to tell kids you are pregnant when they are toddlers or pre-school children:
Generally, toddlers respond better to visual stimuli, which is why using a pregnant doll as a way on how to tell kids you are pregnant can be successful.
You can order a pregnant doll online, which is likely to contain instructions on how it works.
Usually, these dolls have a stomach that can open up or release the baby in some way. You can demonstrate to your baby how this works or use the doll as a puppet.
“Is this doll like mommy? Do you see that it has a big tummy like mommy? Well, that’s because we both have a surprise inside. Look, it’s a little baby. Do you see the baby?
Well, mommy has one just like it inside her. Mommy’s baby is not ready yet, so I can’t take it out; however, when the time comes, we’ll have our own baby just like this doll.
Isn’t that fun? Will you help mommy take care of her baby?”
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Both you and your kids can learn pretty much anything on YouTube. It is a great learning tool, especially for toddlers who respond better to visual aids.
It may take a bit of searching to find the perfect YouTube video for your kids, but the right ones should include illustrations, graphics, and age-appropriate language. However, and most importantly, it should say exactly what it needs to say about pregnancy.
When the video is done, you can make your big reveal and reinforce what was taught in that video. This is how you can do it:
“Did you like that video? Well, I have a surprise for you! Mommy is just like that lady in the video.
She has a baby in her tummy, and the little baby inside is excited to meet you all! This means that you are a big boy/girl now, and you’ll be somebody’s big brother/sister!
Are you ready to meet the baby?”
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2 Ways to Tell It to Pre-Teens
After kindergarten, your child has most likely been exposed to pregnant women; this is likely true for those who are leading up to their pre-teen years.
By now, they should have an idea of where babies come from or at least what a pregnant stomach means.
This may mean that you have to tell them as soon as you start showing because they will likely realize quickly that something is different about you.
Here are two ways on how to tell kids you are pregnant if your kids are pre-teens/tweens:
If you believe that your kids are not yet old enough for the “birds and the bees” talk, especially when they are just transitioning from their toddlers years to young children, you can use a storybook that is specifically designed for this purpose; it will help you get your message across to your children.
This book should have sufficient and age-appropriate explanations of what pregnancy is, what he/she can expect, and good illustrations/pictures to drive the point home.
This is what you can say to your kids before handing them the book:
“Can you help mommy read this storybook? It’s about pregnancy! Since I’m pregnant, I want us to be prepared together for your new sibling. Is that okay with you honey?”
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If your pre-teen r is not scared of going to the doctor, and is perhaps interested in these sorts of things, you can use your next ultrasound as a way on how to tell kids you are pregnant.
Firstly, you will have to contact your gynaecologist to find out if kids are allowed in the examination room. Once you have received the approval of your doctor or clinic, you can use this moment to your advantage.
While an ultrasound visit usually happens in front of someone else, it is not necessarily the same as being in public; a doctor’s office is considered a private place.
Seeing the baby on the screen can help your child have a better understanding of what is happening; the chances are that it will be an unforgettable moment for your kids to see or hear the heartbeat of the baby.
You should have a conversation in the car before you head into your appointment if you have a feeling that your child may react negatively. This is what you can say:
“I told you that we were coming to the doctor’s office, but I didn’t tell you why.
We’re seeing a sonographer, which is a person that uses a machine to look inside a pregnant woman’s stomach. We’re here today to take a look at the baby that is growing inside of me.
Are you excited to see it?”
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2 Ways How to Tell Kids You Are Pregnant: Teenagers and Adults
Teenagers and adults already have an understanding of what pregnancy entails, so you won’t have much explaining to do.
Telling your teenagers and your grown-up kids that you are pregnant is all about your approach.
Here are two ways on how to tell kids you are pregnant when they are teenagers and adults:
At a certain age, your kids won’t need any tools or anything extra to tell them that you are pregnant; you can even tell them before you start showing.
A simple sit-down talk is a great way to level with your teenager or adult-child; you can take the opportunity to discuss what role you would like him/her to play, what may change with this new baby, and address any concerns that he/she may have about the arrival of the new baby.
This is one way that you can initiate the conversation:
“So, I (we) called this family meeting to discuss the fact that I am pregnant. I took a test a week ago, and we just got the results from the doctor; he confirmed it!
I know this pregnancy is a bit unexpected, but I’m very excited! I hope you (all) are too.”
Photo by Sebastian Voortman under pexels license
If your kids live on their own and/or are too far away to visit for a sit-down talk, you can relay this information over the phone.
A phone call is more intimate than a text message or email, which may translate badly in written form.
This is a good idea when you are getting ahead of the news, and you are letting him/her know first. It would be very unfortunate if he/she got a call/text from someone else about the news.
This is one way that you can say it:
Photo by Julia M Cameron under pexels license
E.g. 1 “Hey, I have some news, but I want you to sit down before I tell you. No, it’s nothing bad, but it is life-changing. I want you to be comfortable when you hear it.
Okay, do you remember the guy I had over for Christmas dinner that I said was a friend from work? Well, we’ve actually been dating, and it turns out I’m pregnant!
I didn’t even know that I could still have babies, but here we are!I It’s truly a miracle! You’re going to be a big brother/sister again!”
E.g. 2 “I know you’re busy, so I’ll get straight to the point. So, your father and I have been trying to conceive for a few years now, and we’ve finally succeeded. The doctor said I’m six weeks along!”
Now that you have figured out how to tell kids you are pregnant, you can go ahead and do it! You can start preparing together for this new blessing. Congratulations!