Try to imagine for a second what it would be like to have your doctor tell you that you are sick and your sickness is terminal. Not a fun thing to think about that is for sure. Besides all the medical attention you will need to sustain your life, you will have another battle to fight against, as well, and that involves the mental side of things. People will try to say things to you in hopes that you will be comforted in the process, but more often than not, the words add insult to injury. The fact of the matter is that people do not know what to say or how to say, so they babble off something in an attempt to try to console an individual that is ultimately going to die. As you can see, there are a lot of reasons to know how to say goodbye to someone who is dying and what support you can offer to them .
Truthfully, terminally ill patients would rather hear nothing at all than an attempt to make them feel better. More often than not, terminally ill individuals will bring up the matter with close friends and family, but if they do not bring up the topic to others, they are trying to live life the best way they can. They are not feeling any better, and they are trying to do the best they can with the time they have left. Furthermore, if the topic is brought up, here are some things to consider when saying goodbye to someone who is dying. Words could make all the difference.
First, if someone you know has just been diagnosed terminally, wait for them to bring it up in conversation. In other instances, it might be worth a friend or family member to tell the terminally ill patient that they are here for them if they want to talk, but anyone else should just wait for the terminally ill person to bring it up. Even so, remember to not be pushy. You might actually push someone away. In the end, people who are dying just want to spend time with the people they love, so if you are in that category, spend as much time as humanly possible.
If you do have the opportunity to talk with a terminally ill individual, remember to say that you love them. You never know how many more time you will be able to share how you feel with them, and if you are in their life, you must matter to them in some fashion. Other things you may want to hit include mending a situation, if forgiveness needs to happen, or thanking them for the things they have done in your life. Being truthful in this situation gives honesty and authenticity to every conversation. Memories and stories are a powerful tool when figuring what to say to someone who is dying. This tip is a wonderful way to remember the things that your loved one accomplished in their life, proving their significance to the world.
Furthermore, speaking to goals or bucket-list items with your loved might be another key exchange between you and them. This can be a fun way to plan things with whatever time the person has left. Dreaming has proven to keep terminally ill patients motivated to push forward, while giving them something to look forward to. This might be something small like traveling around locally, or something big like traveling to another state to experience the beach. If you can be involved in this planning, be grateful for your worth to this person.
When figuring out how to say goodbye to someone who is dying stay away from cliches. An example like “This is God’s Plan” does not help the matter in the least. First off, everyone says these types of phrases, so they do not feel real, and they might actually hurt the person. Even encouragement like “You are going to beat this” states something that might not be true in the long run. Ultimately, the best thing to do might be to give a person space when they need it and spend time with them when they are in need of your assistance.
Sometimes, non-verbal gestures can be the best thing to do when trying to figure out what to say to someone who is dying. Stop by and deliver a meal to the loved one and their family, if they have one. This is a fantastic way to show you care, and you can stay for a little bit while having a conversation about whatever they want to talk about. The loved one might even want you to stay the entire night and have the meal with them. Also, consider asking if you can help them with their chores or errands like shopping, cleaning, taking them to the doctors, etc. Spending so much time receiving medical attention can be draining for a person who is terminally ill. This proves that you are willing to walk with someone in their challenging time, if you do life with them. They might be interested in having you help out. These things can be the best way to support a loved one.
In the end, when you are thinking how to say goodbye to someone who is dying and offer support, it might be best to not say anything, but listen instead. A person who is terminally ill may just want to talk to you. They are not looking for advice; they just need a sounding board. Just listening to a person says a lot when thinking about how to say goodbye to someone who is dying. This will show beyond a doubt that you are willing to do a lot more than most to help them during this difficult time.